Being in relation with another human is hard work!  You are you, they are them; each of y'all bring yourselves into the dynamic.  This means two people's stuff (childhood, trauma, attachment, mom/dad issues, communication, fears, hopes, dreams, expectations) are working with and for and against each other.  

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This type of therapy aims at working with three clients-- you, your partner, and your relationship.  Each equally as important and needs to be tended to.  We must work to stay in connection while regulating our own nervous system & asking for our wants and needs. 

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I work with partnerships seeking to regain trust, build connection, find common ground, understand each other, figure out next steps, and overall seeking help together.  I work with partners that are gay, lesbian, nonbinary, poly, open, ENM, kink, trans, and any other way of identifying partnership. 

 

I trained in PACT (psychobiological approach to couples therapy) with Stan Tatkin.  I am level one certified and take this as one approach during therapy.  PACT is an intervention technique that encompasses much of what I believe in a theoretical model individually and in partnership.  

[learn more about PACT here]

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Each partnership is unique and the goals are as well.  I do intake sessions with each partner individually and then together to get a good sense of each part.  Then, we work together with tips, strategies, insights, and new skills to help work towards mutual goals.  I do not focus on the day to day arguments, I focus on the deeper work of what's happening under the argument.  Let's break the patterns of communication and misses in connection that lead to the arguments.  Let's be real, the argument is rarely about the surface level things-- it's rarely about the dishes, the dogs, who does what, sex, the in-laws, etc.  It is typically about hurt feelings and missed opportunities for love, reassurance, connection, vulnerability, and security. 

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I also use a variety of techniques from different relationship theorist, of course attachment theories, and sex based therapy models to help do this work.